Experiencing Something Real

"I spend a lot of my time on expeditions feeling quite close to giving up. I really like normal life. I like sitting on the sofa, sitting on the sofa in front of the TV drinking beer. So when I'm away on a trip, when I'm feeling miserable I think why do I do this? Why am I not at home? But I'm also very very stubborn to myself and I've realized a long time ago that the hardships and miseries are the things that you look back on with the most fondness and happiest memories. So I've just really set myself a non-negotiable rule that giving up is not really an option. So I just keep going despite being miserable."

"...the more you do the trips, the more you realize everything's gonna be alright. You just know how to wing it."

"For life now...you can literally live your life behind a computer screen. You can have all your engagements with people via the internet. You can visit the world via the internet. You can buy food to feed you via the internet. You can spend your whole life behind a computer screen now. There's a lot of wonderful aspects to that, but I think there's kind of a yearning in people now to feel real life a bit more. And real life can take the form of whatever people like. Live music rather than listening to CDs for example. Or getting out there and getting freezing wet and cold and muddy on the weekend and to just savor getting home to a hot bath and warm bed. I think it helps you feel a bit more alive."

It's the excitement of the unknown. Being in emptiness and space is just wonderful. Suffering is just a side effect. It's type two fun. It comes in brief flickers of moments...the brief sunshine on your path. This is why I'm doing it. Struggle is all apart of it...in order to arrive...in order to survive and in order to experience something real.

People want to experience something real but I believe many just don't know how. Some want to but outwardly they don't. They act like little robots with their smartphones and high tech gadgets. With that money they could travel for months or fund an expedition far away. Life can be lived behind a computer screen, and not only can it, but many people do live life behind a computer screen or a phone screen. Basically: Robots. They don't know what it is like to experience life, but whether they know it or not I do believe they crave it. They want to experience something real.

This trip I will embark on in 7 short weeks is an attempt to experience something real. Things will go wrong, plans will fail and misery will set in. But how else must we be stretched like Gumby? How else must we lean and grow? I hope to experience the real coast, the real desert, the real mountains and the real cities. As they say it will be an adventure of a lifetime and depending on how it goes, how I will succeed, a follow-up adventure is bound to be in the works. But I cannot talk about that just yet. I must get through this one first...so I am able to talk about it and reminisce about the good 'ole times and bad trying times. I have heard it said, "If you think you will succeed, it's too easy." Do I think I will succeed? Well, what's success? Making it to San Francisco? Mexico? Just having fun? Well...I can tell you with much confidence and sincerity, this trip, by no means of the imagination will be 'too easy.' What are we but mere mortals trying to make a path. I want my path to have some lasting memories. Lead the way Lord.

When life gives you lemons, you  better start juggling. Chew on that for a moment.

Monster Cookie: a look at type one fun and type two fun

Yesterday, April 27th I took part in the Salem Bicycle Club's Monster Cookie Metric Century Bicycle Ride. It is 62 miles from the state capitol to a lunch break at Champoeg State Park and back. Apparently this was one of the worst Monster Cookies they've had in regards to the weather and turn out. For much of the ride, there was a downpour of rain, even some hail. It was very cold but the sun did appear and tease us here and there. Click on the following link to read a story about the ride:

http://www.statesmanjournal.com/story/news/local/2014/04/27/rain-dampens-participation-monster-cookie-ride/8287413/ 

 

I was one of these 800 riders. However, I was unable to finish due to a sudden dizzy spell and had to take a SAG vehicle back and, in turn, took me (against my will) to urgent care and abandoned me there...but after much sleep, I am better now...but alas, it is a concern seeing that my departure date is 7 weeks away...pray please!

Okay, at the time I was having a back flash to Chicago, where a similar thing happened many years prior. I wanted to finish the ride. I was looking forward to it all year. But alas, there's always next year and I will come back with a vengeance. The club does have a century they do in mid-September that I hope to be a cake walk after I complete 3500 miles on the coast.

Now to a concern. I would be lying if I were to say there is no concerns and I have no doubts about this trip. Things go wrong, yes. But I do get occasional bouts of dizziness that remains undiagnosed. I have not let this condition hinder me, but this condition has hindered me in various ways. I cannot control it. If I could, then there would be no problem. The main problem it seems comes when other people are involved. I am not talking about people close to me like family, but mainly strangers who care. That seems odd, but it is because of them that I end up in urgent care or hospitals when the only cure is to get some rest. Strangers who care are welcomed, but they need to listen to the one who hurts and knows his body more than anyone else but God. Even some doctors who I see could care less and send me off because they are clueless and are busy with other patients and just want the big bucks. Gone are the days that doctors and nurses and people in general genuinely desire to help you as a person rather than be driven by green backs. But strangers who care will come and I will deal with them the best way I know how...with quiet patience.

Should I reconsider this trip with only 7 weeks to go? Should I cancel what I have poured into so much this past year? Whereas sitting back on the couch and watching movies all summer while eating ice cream out of a bowl of comfort sounds so appealing to many (me included), that is a type one fun. Type two fun is where it's not fun at the time, but is only fun in hindsight. Type one fun is having fun in the moment. Type two fun is miserable, trudging across deserts, cycling through mountains, going on grueling expeditions. There may be freezing cold nights, grueling desert heat, hunger, thirst, headaches, breakdowns, tears. They may not be fun at the time, but afterwards, when all is said and done, the experiences, the lessons, the stories, the pictures & videos, the memories, the vast array of newness...live on with you. And it is fun when it is over. There are times when I find myself wanting to quit because I like the idea of sleeping in a warm bed and eating a home-cooked meal. But there is something to be said, a lot to be said about type two fun. Which type of fun do you like to have? And can I persuade you to attempt a type two fun? I have realized a long time ago will continue to learn that the hardships and miseries of life you look back on with the most fondness and happiest memories. So basically, there is a non-negotiable rule that giving up is not really an option. So, just keep going despite being miserable.

What have I to doubt? God has taken me through so much thus far. If God is for me who or what can be against me? My SAG support will be with me. He must be the drive that speaks to my ear the YES and the GO...when I myself doubt and reconsider. There may be no diagnosis to my bouts of dizziness, but I have had them for many many years. Since then, I have rode my bicycle thousands and thousands of miles, ran in countless races, climbed mountains, swam rivers, camped in rainstorms, traveled cross country...all not without difficulty, but with courage and determination...and, though I have had anxiety about what will happen in 7 weeks, I expect no less from this journey. For God art with me.

a little further

We are the Pilgrims, master; we shall go

Always a little further: it may be

Beyond that last blue mountain barred with snow,

Across that angry or that glimmering sea.

A little further is all I ask. There are just over seven weeks left to departure and I can feel myself becoming stressed, under duress, excited, anxious, you name it. The negative feelings I wish were gone, but alas, I am who I am and this will happen whether I am ready or not. All I ask is a little further. My bicycle mileage is approaching 3,000 within the last year since I bought my bike. In four short months I anticipate doubling that figure...probably over doubling it. It seems surreal really. Crazy as it seems I, along with some supporting companions for most of the trip, I will depart for a summer-long adventure. I have never done something to this extent, of this magnitude. I could spend all night pouring over maps and the days buying endless amount of gear but the fact of the matter is I just need to get a little further down the road. One perfect circle cycle after another. 

I am a pilgrim  on a journey and a little further down the road or path is a joy that I can take in. It is amazing to foresee what I will see and experience. When I am there in the moment, it must be even more amazing. I may get sick, dizzy, get a flat or seventeen, have some run in with an angry armadillo, get run off the road by an angry trucker, get thirsty in the desert, hungry in the mountains, aching on the coast...those I must not dwell on. Tears will fall, but the joys will come and come and outweigh the tears. They will dry them up and I will experience...enough to fill a travel book and pictures enough to produce some spectacular slideshows and other creative materials.

This will happen...a little further...even if I don't get anymore contributions to my cause. Time will tell as the old adage exclaims. A little further also refers to Perfect Circles in the sense of the camp start up, the bicycle adventure ministry I pray will become reality. A little further down the road of life. Books, videos, trips, adventures, work, conversations, recordings, business, travel, maps, plans, food...a little further...it will, alas, it must come together so I can go...and travel...and cycle...and pedal...and trudge...journey...a little further.

http://www.plumfund.com/pf/perfectcircles

I have included this link to my fundraising website. Feel free to make a contribution of any amount. It will be greatly appreciated. Ask my questions if you want. I will be more than willing to answer.

A Warm Shower

www.warmshowers.org is a community for touring cyclists and hosts. It is similar to www.couchsurfing.org, but with an emphasis on bicycle touring. When traveling by bike, people can contact someone registered with warmshowers.org and request to stay with them for a night. And in turn they will be gracious and offer their place and any amenities they desire. It is based wholly on 100% hospitality and common courtesy is expected. Why do I mention this? Well, last weekend I had two such bicycle tourists stop by and crash for a night. One (Kai) was from Germany and the other (Marco) from Seattle. Kai, a bicycle messenger, flew into Seattle and met up with his buddy Marco, also a bike messenger. Together they rode their bikes south and met up with me in Salem on Sunday night. They were heading to San Francisco where Marco would fly back to Seattle and Kai would ride on, making his way to Mexico City where there is a bike messenger world championship taking place.

These two were very friendly and even shared their pasta and apple pie with me. Although, they did leave their beers in my frig which I don't plan on drinking myself. But I got inspired by their gung-ho attitude. They were not carrying much and were able to ride between 100 to 150 miles daily. They liked to see stuff, but they were all about the miles. If they can do that, I can surely average 50 miles daily. I enjoyed talking with them and accommodating another bicycle tourist or two in this case in my home. For, I don't have many, if any friends who share my passion for bicycle traveling. Hopefully things like this upcoming trip and the local bike club will help me gain some adventure-minded friends.

That said, I do enjoy camping out in the wild, but also, I would very much like to take advantage of warmshowers.org and meet people and have great conversations. Plus, I will be on a strict budget and this will help in cutting costs. A warm shower wouldn't hurt either...to wash off my bike grime.

Ah, adventure looms around the corner and the wind beckons forth...

As the days count down

As the days count down to take off I find myself getting more and more excited and anxious about every detail and plan made. As an American tourist, I tend to fret too much rather than do what I ought to: just get on the bike and peddle. I know I'll be okay out there on the road and I know I always have a place to run to if I need it, but the simple fact is this has been a dream of mine for a very long time and it's finally becoming a reality. Truth be told, if you have a dream and you want it bad enough you just need to take a risk and fight for it. You can't let life hold you down where you continuously find yourself saying, 'man I wish I could have done that when I had the chance.' It only sets you up for that last day on earth where you say to yourself the only thing I regret is not doing what I wanted to do. Life is yours to live, so live it. That said, I could use my summer vacation to sit around, watch movies, go on hikes, camping, hang out with family, be comfortable, but I have a dream and my hope is that this trip will be the start of something bigger...

June 15th sets me on a path I know will change me for the greater. One week alone in the wilderness can do so much to one's mind. Granted, I won't be completely alone with my friend and supporter joining me for most of the adventure. I will be in the wilderness and cities taking in the most breathtaking vistas, skies, waterfalls, and coastlines, and all at 10 mph. Cars passing me at 80 miles and hour on roads without shoulders, unpredictable rain showers, cold brisk mornings and grueling desert heat will surely test every ounce of mental strength I have. I'll find myself crying my eyes out in the middle of nowhere from the doorstep of God's creation, the physical pain I will endure and the loneliness I will feel. But it is all for the sake of adventure and dreaming...dream to live? or live to dream?

When I return in August I will have ridden my bike over 3500 miles, become a new man and have found a new respect for life and the great beauty that is our world...though only a glimpse of it. I will spend Independence Day with the company of the Golden Gate and will arrive home on my birthday to celebrate another year gone by, an adventure complete and cheers to looking ahead for adventure number two. For those of you who want to follow my progress, I will try my best to update my blog when given the chance and my friend has downloaded strava on his smartphone. It is a ride-tracking/sharing application that allows friends and family to track my progress back home. I hope to make at least a slideshow if not movie of my travels when I return sharing my experiences with folks along the way, the hard times, break downs and the emotional battles one faces on the bike for so long. And you guessed it, I will also work on putting together a travel book of sorts chronicling my odyssey.

Please take the time to share my blog with others and help make a difference.

dream big,

Penn

ONE

I am but one. One among many. So, here’s my thought: I enjoy travel. I like adventure and arguably come from a very adventurous family. My Mom is a world traveler and has been to close to fifty different nations. My Dad has been to several with her and always enjoys exploring the wilderness with loved ones. My sister has traveled criss-cross around the country and has also done a fair amount of traveling and missions work in other nations. My brother has traveled in Eastern Europe and road tripped through Central America. He is currently enrolled in a 2-year mountain guide school that has taken him from Alaska to Patagonia to Spain and back again. With all these travels comes many experiences and meeting new people, eating new foods and doing new activities in amazing and not-so amazing settings. So, in a word: adventure. Therefore, it is not by mistake that I would pick up the same adventure gene and want the same for my life. The same ‘ole thing gets kind of boring and the world beckons for attention.

I am but one. There is one of me on this Perfect Circles odyssey next summer. Granted, I do have a support guy that is in as well. And for that I am very grateful and welcome him and his wife with open arms as they did to me a few years ago. However, for the sake of argument, there is one going on this trip. I have clumped me and my friend into the “one.” I have made the route publicly known and have sent out advertisements for companions. I have invited anyone who wants to come along for any leg of the journey. I have had a few minor interests, but nothing definite. I know everyone has their lives and not many people can just take a summer and leave, but no one even has expressed so much as a “awe man, I wish I could go.” I have tried to gain supporters and raise any funds for said trip that would’ve been a support raising journey for the start of a camp or a bicycle trip ministry, but within the past year I have had zero interest. I am not saying I don’t have support. I do. I have people who believe in me and support my decisions. But beyond that (save from my family) I have had zero interest. I ran into the same obstacle with my dream to start a Christian camp ministry. In my journey I have discovered that no one is willing to “get their hands dirty” but many are willing to “support me.” I don’t really know what “support” means to a lot of people, but it seems to me that they use that word all to frequently and it has lost some of its meaning.

I ask, “Where have all my good friends gone to?” I was thinking just the other day that if a friend of mine was in my position asking for companions or whatnot, I would have been all over that. If nothing else, I would be excited for them. This is not a complaint blog. It is more of an observance blog. With four months to go until departure day, I can’t help but notice and observe the lack of support. This trip, I hope, goes hand-in-hand with my dream of staring a camp. “Perfect Circles” is not just a name I devised for this 2014 trip, it is the name of a hopeful future bicycle adventure ministry. This trip, I have made it known will hopefully be the first in many trips and adventures (with differing locations) in a series of “Perfect Circles” journeys that will, God-willing reflect research and support-raising for a future in Christian camping that may first take form as a bicycle adventure ministry for youth and adults.

Here’s to hoping a future blog will claim two or three or thirty-four.

I do thank all of you have expressed some form of support for me and my trip. Gratitude goes out to. But for now…keep the wheels rolling and the sending the prayer upwards. I will update more as “Perfect Circles” is formed and I talk to my present comrade-in-arms. Peace to you.

Weather or not, here I come

In just four short months I will embark on a journey of a lifetime (which itself will hopefully be the first in a series of “Perfect Circles” journeys). In a way it seems surreal, especially when I don’t feel ready. Part of me wants to plan and likes to plan, but another part of me says, “just skip the planning and GO.” I have read up on many adventurers and their treks and recently I came upon one guy who basically chose not to prepare at all, well at least prepare in the “this is where I’m going” aspect. He took his bike, tent, and toothbrush and headed out to get lost on the open road to cycle around the world. It just so happens fate had other plans and he met a girl enroute and fell in love. But isn’t that the essence of adventurous travel? That is what separates travel from adventurous travel I suppose. Whatever happens in four months, I will be on an adventure. This does comfort me some to know that whatever purchases I may need or whatever planning I think necessary, the “Go factor” is what matters and the open road is what beckons and looms over the rest.

                                   

I would be lying if I said I had no worries. Worry beckons whenever I get dizzy from inactivity or I feel sick from cycling across town. Worry makes itself present when my legs fail to carry me up a mild city hill or when my core feels weak or when my bike acts up and I need to get it looked at. In a Bible study a few weeks ago I looked at the Do Not Worry passage in the Gospel of Luke. That passage is so relevant and yet so easy to look past and ignore. What do I have to worry about? God will protect me and provide for me as He has protected and provides for the sparrows and lilies. But alas, it is much easier to say or write such things than it is to put into practice. After all, God has provided this adventure and laid a dream in my lap…so why wouldn’t He keep me safe on such a voyage? It will be an incredible feeling once I get a few weeks down the road and learn to keep my wits about me and have a sense of “this is actually happening!”

So I say to you, “Weather or Not, Here I Come.” (Now, before you English fanatics get excited, no I did not misuse the word ‘weather’ when I should’ve used ‘whether,’ nor did I unintentionally replace ‘ready or not’ with ‘weather or not.’) ‘Weather or not, here I come’ refers not only to the physical elements that surround us out-of-doors, but also to any physical bodily weather or preparation weather. Where do you think they get the term, “Under the weather?” I pray that I will cycle above the weather and gouge out any eye of any storm that I may encounter. I pray that I will fear no evil or thief or trucker or hill that I will encounter. Whether there is weather or not (and there will be, so the “or not” is obsolete) I will ride my mechanical horse down the Pacific Coast of the US of A and God-willing, back up through the Mojave Desert and Sierra Nevada Mountains. Weather will try to haunt me all the way along and will be my constant companion but I must embrace it like a brother. Although I do ask for your prayer, even though it is four months away, I ask for prayer for final preparations and also during the trip itself. The weather will find me. I pray that it won’t find me unawares. This is becoming real. This is actually going to happen. What have I gotten myself into? Well, the answer is: adventure.

Weather or not, here I come…