OVER TO YOU
I have read the book and have been mulling over these questions for some time. I am a thinker and have never thought that I would experience a book as such as this one. I am a perfectionist in part and that can be tricky when putting pen to paper. I want it to be perfect, but alas, it will never be. They say just to begin and the rest will follow. Where is my adventurous life? It is here. It is now. It is here and now.
2. What does living adventurously mean to you?
4. What did 'living adventurously' mean to you 10 years ago?
5. List all the 'no buts' you were shouting at me.
6. Think of something you have been doing for a long time. It could relate to your job, outside work or with your family. Ask yourself, 'why do I do this thing?'
7. Why do you want to live more adventurously? Brainstorm or make spider diagrams until things become clearer.
9. Write a letter of advice from your 80-year-old self to you today.
10. What is an example of a time you said a bold 'yes' to an opportunity and were glad of it?
*-- Why do you want to live more adventurously? Think about your motivations rather than considering specific activities.
"I'm actually sending this reply to myself as well as to you, because it's really myself who I want to read the answers to these questions. It's me who needs to understand how and why I need to add adventure back into my life. It's me who I'm really talking to as I type these words."
That's it, isn't? That's what it is. We do this for ourselves. Living more adventurously is really for me, for my own well-being. I tend to write about it for myself too. If anyone feels so inclined to read about my adventures and journeys, then that's great too. I believe everyone who wants to can make adventure a part of their lifestyle. I want to live more adventurously to escape a boring life. I want to live more adventurously to gain more experiences and have memories...with myself as well as those I love. Adventure is a state of mind and I get that. I want to live more adventurously to leave a legacy of what's important. Adventure matters and it comes in all shapes and sizes.
*-- What is the most significant change you would like to make in your life?
"I could just pack up my saddlebags, grab my horse and head straight out the farm gate. Or, more realistically, just be more spontaneous with the small stuff. All the things that I really want to do, because they're not big and bold, I'm a bit ashamed of making time for..."
I've done big and bold before, or at least according to me. I want to never neglect big and boldness. I want to embark on the big and bold adventures in my life...perhaps at least one, or something a year. I could write about them and document them through photos. Big and bold doesn't necessarily constitute a full life however. That is why I love the idea of microadventures, small, local adventures close to home. These can also become exciting and new and bold.
*-- What barriers stand in your way?
Barriers...everywhere we find barriers. "What ifs" are dangerous. What if this happens? What if I get sick? What if I can't make it? What if I fall? Ah, but what if you fly? Barriers for me, I suppose, would include family, sometimes health issues, prior commitments and my own flabbiness, mental and otherwise. Procrastination and time management are huge ones. Time is a factor that can be carried away if not looked after. Money can also become a factor.
"Most blokes my age just aren't interested in doing these things so going solo does hold me back a little, sometimes. Sleeping in a hedge with a buddy is definitely easier."
There is that. Although going solo has its perks and benefits for sure.
"9-to-5 belongs to work, 5-to-9 belongs to family. It's hard to find a space for me in there."
I get that. Someone close to me once said, "Remember who you are." So I went for a bike ride. But seriously, don't neglect who you are. Regardless of work and family and time, you have to remember who you are and not neglect the important stuff. Don't give up on your dreams and realizations of the future. You are you and were made for a purpose. Realize that purpose and follow those dreams without sacrificing your inner core.
What happens next? Will you stay where you are...or will you jump?
It's time to plan my escape.
2. What does living adventurously mean to you?
(Keep your personal definition in mind every time I use the phrase)
"It really is about the connection, isn't it, between 'adventure' and daily life? I've been to the mountains, taken road trips around the East. But how do I integrate that into the day-to-day? Does it have to be separate? Does it always have to be, 'adventures out there, routine back here at home?"
This really resonates with me. Must we separate adventure and routine? Home and abroad? It really is about that connection. Adventure and real life. Can't real life equal adventure? Shall we have an adventure of a lifetime or a lifetime of adventure? I've seen the mountains and the ocean. I have cycled many thousands of miles around the deserts and canyons, prairies and mountains, rivers and lakes of the West. But I have always come home to a warm bed and hot shower, only to 'plan' the next adventure. Must the two be exclusive? Separate? Alas, they are different. Can't we have adventure at home? Or does that defeat the definition? It all depends upon how you define the term 'adventure,' I suppose. Raising kids can be an adventure. Getting married can be an adventure. That is an adventure of mine I recently embarked on. Having said that, after wedding my beautiful bride, defining adventure has changed. Whereas I still very much desire to conduct bicycle adventure trips in the future, I have been forced to think more locally. I recently just completed a 40-day journey of cycling to every city and county park in my hometown. I explored many neighborhoods and parks I never knew existed in all my years of living here. I learned and discovered a lot. The world of microadventures is growing and during these times we must embrace the locality of adventure. That is not to say we must abandon grand adventures all together, but rather tweak our sense of adventure. Adventure awaits and it is not far away. You only have to look for it.
"I want to come out from behind the computer screen and TV. I want to grow as a person, in character, fitness, health and spirit. I want to find out what I'm capable of, learn new skills and discover every corner of [my homeland]. To sum it up, I want to come out of hibernation."
That about sums it up doesn't it? I want to come out of hibernation. As an American with a television set, it is an easy thing, and all too tempting to just lounge around while the world out my front door stands still, waiting to be explored. Not that this is a bad thing, but when it starts to rule your life, then it becomes a bad thing. Don't neglect that bike, those running shoes, that basketball, that rain suit. Don't neglect your tools of adventure.
3. Theoretically, how could you change direction to live more adventurously? Ignore all the barriers and realities of life. We will tackle them later.
"I could quit my job, rent out my house and sell my car. Spend some time travelling with my family."
That is good. But what about security? You see what I did there? It's easy to play the "What If" game. This also takes convincing. But the ideas and dreams are endless. The possibilities abound. Travel, make memories. Give experiences rather than stuff that goes away!
"Avoid the pub/gym/TV after work and break the cycle!
"Commit to doing a single thing I feel is 'adventurous' every week and sleeping wild at least once a month."
It's about goals and commitment.
What would be the worst thing that might happen if you did this?
The worst thing I believe is, after trying something new, it doesn't work out and you go back. You tried and failed, but failing isn't failure. It's only part of the process. You go away with an experience and a lesson. Boom...so is that such a bad thing?
What good things could happen if you did this?
Well quite the same thing, except you would stick with it. Build upon the experience and add more memories to your ever-growing repertoire of adventure. So...the easy thing to say is that what could go wrong? Well, a lot, but isn't that all a part of the adventure? Grab life and go.
4. What did 'living adventurously' mean to you 10 years ago?
"I would imagine these are some fairly standard answers and basically overcomeable by just growing a pair, committing and getting out there..."
Ten years ago I was still chasing bicycle adventures, but not to the extent as I do today. I was in the midst of Christian camping and thought that was what I was meant to do. The dream or call has kind of evolved since then and I have always thought about doing some bicycle adventure ministry with an element of outdoor education. With my wife, I have begun to brainstorm ideas. Both children and adults, young and old need adventure and need education. I'm not talking about books. I'm talking about experience and travel. Doing and learning. Seeing and observing.
What does it mean today?
"I'm always torn between what society says someone my age should be doing, the fear of not knowing what my future self might need and living in the present."
"Get off the phone. Get off the couch. I have more time than I imagine. Stop armchair adventuring."
Of course there's nothing wrong with armchair adventuring. I do it quite often. There's a whole collection on my bookshelves. But, I think the sentiment here is if that is all we do, we miss out on the grand scheme. They say you can delve into worlds untold through countless books, but I do believe you do miss out on world aplenty if you don't open your door and explore more. There is something to be said in the way the world looks as opposed to read.
If you continue living the way you are, where will that put you 10 years from now?
"I can do this by keeping myself open to the opportunities that sometimes appear serendipitously if I stay aware."
I believe the way I am living is continuing to evolve. It is a work in progress. It is a process and as a married man, is not something I go through alone. My wife and I are one, but at the same time also have different dreams and aspirations. But we are in this life together and have made a commitment to each other and before God are in it for the long haul. Therefore, we consult with each other and help each other grow towards God and grow as a person. Ten years from now, I hope to continue to be adventurous, seeing more of the world and our own country with my wife. If the Lord blesses us with children, I hope to raise them to be curious and adventurous with a healthy dose of risk.
Is that a direction you are happy with?
Time will tell. Time always tells. But right now, as I expect to be in the future am happy with my wife. But marriage isn't always about happiness. It is about growth and making oneself sacred in front of God.
5. List all the 'no buts' you were shouting at me.
"I've lost my sense of purpose, I need a new challenge, I want a new job, but I don't know what I want. Barriers? [Still an instructional assistant at my school], still trying to do everything and not managing to keep anyone, least of all me, happy. I'm not afraid to step out of my comfort zone, I just can't decide how. I bet you wish you'd never asked your questions now!"
"I'm going to see how I can bring the attitude and feeling I get on a challenging hike or a big climb to my daily life. Can I approach a tricky meeting with the same excitement and enthusiasm for the challenge which I feel about an outdoors adventure?
That's the question, isn't it? Can I bring the attitude and enthusiasm for the challenge I experience on a bike ride up a mountain pass to my daily life? It's an interesting thought. It would be nice to change my job and find something I am passionate about that can bring about change and encourage someone else to live more adventurously. I keep coming back to my bike adventure ministry idea...perhaps combined with a coffee shop run by my wife. But...I need to eliminate excuses...and just do. I know what I ought to do. It's a matter now to just do it.
6. Think of something you have been doing for a long time. It could relate to your job, outside work or with your family. Ask yourself, 'why do I do this thing?'
"I'd love to take off in a campervan, just me and the kids and our dog and live on the road and homeschool and all that. But that would be humungous and has major drawbacks. I could think smaller and just use out of school time as wisely as possible. Be braver and encourage my kids to be braver. To start!"
I can share that sentiment. I would love to take off in a van, or better yet, on bikes with my wife and when we have kids and just travel and exercise and explore historical sites and our country! It requires curiosity and bravery. Those qualities I want to instill in those around me.
What have I done for a long time? I suppose that would relate to my job right now. I work for our local school district and have done the same thing more or less for almost 9 years. It is a long time to be doing this. "Why do I do this one thing?" Well, I suppose it has changed over time. First, it is a job and I do need money. Money does not motivate me neither does a career. I spend much of my time thinking about other things, my adventure plans or stuff I would rather be doing. I do focus on work, but it isn't always where I want to be. I suppose I have kept it because it has fit my lifestyle with bike trips in the summers and it offers me time to do what I love. Now that I am married, my priorities have changed. I will not quit a job without having a plan lined up unless that is what I am called to do.
Has the answer changed over time?
My answer continues to evolve. I do enjoy my work, but it is draining and times are changing.
Is it still valid?
Validity isn't always a valid question. I know, that doesn't make sense, but then again, sometimes my fingers just type.
7. Why do you want to live more adventurously? Brainstorm or make spider diagrams until things become clearer.
Calling -- Purpose + Direction -- More Alive -- Happier + Healthier -- Memory-making -- Experiences
"I want to live more adventurously because I have worked at the same place for eight years and am scared of change."
"Stop trying to be what others think I should be."
Bonus challenge: 'Five Whys' is a technique for getting deeper into root causes and effects. Look at an answer and ask again, 'why?' Repeat the exercise five times (like an inquisitive toddler) And you'll get a much clearer insight into what drives you.
Why - Why - Why - Why - Why...?
How can you begin living more adventurously?
"I have been doing a lot of soul-searching about my life and realized that I am really quite bored doing the same routine day in/day out. Work, home, family, tidying up, TV, sleep, repeat. Get to the weekend, drink a bottle of wine, try and get the kids outside for a bit, etc."
I can relate to a certain extent. I believe something ought to change if you are living for the weekend. Most of life happens during the week. The weekend is a bonus. Live the week as if it were a weekend! Routine is a good thing, but it can become a slave. Some people need routine to function and I get that. I like routine at times, but it can get boring. Let's shake things up, shall we?
What specific action can you take to put all this into action?
"A few months ago, I realized I was wasting my life thinking and talking about things I wanted to do and then not doing anything about it. I don't want to look back on my life in ten years and realize I threw it away sat in my PJs, drinking too much and watching box sets on Netflix."
That's the ticket. We all don't want to look back on our life with regret. I want to travel more. I want to write more. I want to experience more. What's stopping me? That's the question of the hour! What really matters in life? Find it and do it. For me, first it is serving God and serving my wife second. Nurturing those relationships will help me become more adventurous. What legacy do I want to leave?
8. Write down a bunch of gut feeling, top-of-the-head parameters and see where they lead. Use them to draw up a list of possible projects.
"I want to feel connected to something bigger than myself. My 'adventures' are easy because I just pull out my bike and start riding somewhere. They are fun and inspire others but I am not connecting with a group or cause that is making the world a better place. My adventures feel very selfish. I want to give back and share my love for the world with the world."
I echo these words and this idea. There is an element of selfishness to adventure, isn't there? Bicycling is like an extension of myself and I would love to pass my knowledge and experiences on to the world. I could write a book, research on how to increase the traffic with my blog and brainstorm ideas on how I can incorporate bicycle adventure with education and knowledge with adventure. It starts with why and it starts with motive.
"I will make a plan of microadventures to do over the next 52 weeks and capture the whole experience in photos and videos. I will put it all into a personal blog that might hopefully help others who are struggling."
I have begun to list microadventures, adventures on a small scale that I can do alone or together with my wife. I just completed a project of cycling to each city and county park in my hometown. I've thought about exploring more areas as well as visiting waterfalls and lighthouses and small towns I've never been to. Lists abound and ideas are everywhere. If you want to make something happen, write it down!
Rank these by preference.
Select one specific project that you will take into the rest of this book and turn into action.
Hmm...well I suppose I would love to work on another bicycle adventure project. That is my initial response, but now I am thinking more local and with my wife. So that may have to change. I would love to explore my home state of Oregon...waterfalls, beaches, forests, roads, mountains, lighthouses, parks...
Slash a rejection line through all the other ideas on your list. You can return to them later, but you must discount them for now and focus on one thing.
What is your version of the 'late-night McDonald's idea'? Write it down. 'The adventurous dream that I am going to turn into a reality is_____________.
Perhaps the adventurous dream that I am going to turn into a reality is to visit every state of the union! This has been on my list for a long time and initially I wanted to cycle to or through every state, but we shall see. I do want to include an element of exercise and challenge and risk...it's all a part of adventure!
9. Write a letter of advice from your 80-year-old self to you today.
Send a message to your future self declaring your hopes and plans for them.
"Frankly it makes me a bit sad that I can't think of anything I used to dream of as a kid. Maybe I did dream or have plans, but just forgot about them while growing up? It's something I'd like to go back to, trying to remember what I was like back then and what plans I had when I was a kid. Because I believe that in our childhood the dreams and things we love doing are so pure, without the constraints and filters we apply to our ideas as adults. I do know that 'having fun' was high on my list. Why isn't this a priority anymore?"
Why isn't this a priority anymore? Good question. Shouldn't we still prioritize having fun? When I was a kid I wanted to become a pirate. Obviously I didn't know what pirates really did. At one point I wanted to be a police officer, then a pilot, maybe an actor. There's a reason they call it "childlike" wonder. What if we resorted to acting like kids again? Not the immature, ignorant type, but the playful element! Become playful. I think that is so important. Laugh. Have fun. Explore. Dig in the dirt. Get dirty. Get lost. Break some rules. Don't be afraid to fail. Don't be afraid to fall. Don't worry bout what others think. This is huge! Be yourself!
10. What is an example of a time you said a bold 'yes' to an opportunity and were glad of it?
"I had done a 20-mile bike ride and was having a coffee when three strangers pulled up. I helped fix their bike and asked where they were going.
'Stonehenge for the solstice.'
I asked if I could join them. We all set off, got there at dusk, spent the night amongst the stones and watched the sun come up with some new friends. Brilliant!"
Brilliant indeed. Who has every regretted saying yes? No one has ever regretted saying yes and heading out on a big adventure. But loads of people have regretted not saying yes.
Back in college I remember a friend asked if I wanted to ride 50 miles to a nearby hot springs, camp out and ride back to the college the following day. I said yes and it was an experience I have never forgotten. It sparked subsequent adventurous rides and helped shape my love for bicycle travel.
Every day we have to choose to live a little.
Are there any occasions when you regret not having said yes? Think of examples in your work life and your home life.
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